300

Did not go for gathering as i woke up with a throbbing sore throat and feeling rather dizzy and all.

Croaked at my maid to get me a cup of hot honey with lime as i dragged myself to the bathroom. Sigh. Bad start to the day.

So now, bored with nothing much to do until at least 10pm when Jewel in The Palace starts, i'll blog a lil' bout what to do during this month of break seeing i cancelled almost all stuff earlier this month..

` Check with Jovin about their new location for sailing. I am sooo sure they changed venues. Sigh.
` Orchard. Kai Lin. December 7th. 'nuff said.
` Vanessa informed me of the next gathering on December 8th at Orchard again. I'm so gonna cry. I seriously do not enjoy being there. Sigh.
` KangLi. Sushi. Date not confirmed. Should get Karen and the whole gang down maybe.
` Jung Pu. Lunch. Ditto top.
` Evan. Airport. Ditto. Sigh.

Oh, and John, you still owe me lunch. No act of ignorance is gonna get you outta this. And stop whining about me making you miss Justice League, i'm sorry, okay ? Btw, screw what that michelle thinks. As if you should be bothered by what that bimbo say, come on, i was slandered. Chill bro.

Ps. I'm starting to get second thoughts bout not going for prom. After all, a $50 entrance fee to see Edwin, Johnathan and QuanQi in suits is like totally worth it. Hilarious i mean.

Boo. Holidays HAVE started.

Am back. =]

You know you missed me. Don't bother denying it. Heeeeehz.

I'm just a lil' psyched over the entire trip. It was fun. Yup yup. Bought quite a lot of clothes. And this really kewl pair of slippers. Desmond aka dessie is so wrong about it being boring. Heehz.

Btw, i saw 5 Volkswagen Beetles in Bangkok during me stay. One was orange and well, even though i dont really like orange, it looked simply fab. Yup yup.

And i bought 8 books during my stay there to read. So yea. I brought 10 books back. I think i'm nuts. Oh well. Good read. Muahahaha.

Anyway, gathering for the chihuahuas tomorrow. Even more pscyhed, after all, it's been TWO WHOLE YEARS since we last saw one another. Awww. I miss you guys. =P

Ps. Can someone enlighten me who is matthew ? I cant seem to place a face to the name ya. I asked Vanessa and let's just say her description of him was as well as me winning an argument against Hachi. Which is well, zero. Oh well. She claims he remembers me, so yea, if he really does, he'll find me tomorrow. 1230 at the mrt control station. Yayness.

Pps. Bernard isnt going. Awwwww. Come on. Bro, you are sooooo not onz. Next time i am so not lunch`ing with you again.

It's zoro. =]

I repeat, it's zoro.

So bloody cute. *Squeals*

Check out Cheap Cannon for more adorable one piece illustrations. Some of Kyojin's works really rock.



*swoons*

three lil' words that hurt so

Till the end.

mirage in the desert

Spinning in My Room:
Rebirth - Hirata Hiroaki (Sha Gojyo)
[Gensoumaden Saiyuki Image Album 3]

As i've told Hachi,
"I dont want to think about it anymore. tuesday. one more and it'll be all history."

Sigh. Speaking of Hachi, Agris is back. Yayness. For quite sometime already actually. Hachi'll kill me if he knew what i told Agris. Maybe. Maybe not.

I'm feeling very low tonight. No idea why.

Naomi wants me to accompany her to church tomorrow. But there's something bothering me. Just dont feel like going. Argh. Sick of all these.

Evan, you've been a blessing in many ways. Much thanks for the past 5 years.

You dont have to be perfect for no one can

Choices. Continuation of last.

To cry over someone who keeps believing in you even despite you disappointing him on numerous occasions ?

Or to cry over the mere fact that you've disappointed yourself ?

I really cant take the "i believe in you"s now.

Cause i can feel walls crumbling when you guys say that.


A lil' happiness knowing that you care, a lil' sadness knowing that i've let you down and a whole lot of gratitude for asking me to stay strong.


This seemingly endless vortex of perplexity seems to have taken so much away from me. So much for the flippant lifestyle of past.

Father, only you can help me now. You and only you.

Post hoc ergo propter hoc

After this therefore because of this,

I'm certain that i've failed.

Three days ago, last wednesday, i msg`ed almost all whom i'm supposed to be meeting up with after o's to cancel the appointments made.

Yes.

I called off almost all appointments due after O's, precisely due to that reason.

I'm sorry to all those who had faith in me.
I'm sorry for not having the determination to carry on.
I'm sorry for letting you down.

I really dont want you to tell me, "it's okay" because i know it's not. No matter how much how much you want to make me feel better, i'll only feel worst.

I dont like disappointments. Yet i'm the one who disappoints myself most of the time.

I'm sorry. Especially to you, Evan..


That floodgate called guilt opened and emotions once suppressed gushed out once more. I cant face you.

That mawkish smile plastered on your face every time you pulled me along from one place to another. That hushed voice whispering by my ear whenever i no longer have the courage to face the world. That dazed and faraway look as we sat and spoke of times passed. That twinkling in your eyes whenever you get those crazy plans. That cold hard look you gave me whenever i mentioned giving up.

Maybe you're right, i am an escapist, running to you, to some corner, to my book, to that soliloquy whenever i dont feel alright - This time is no exception. Only thing is, i guess now, it's time i escaped from you too.

I'm sorry, Evan. It's just that, i cant bear to see you and hear you and your "it's okays`" now.

summary

Feeling a lil' melancholic as of late.

Have this urge to puke or to crawl into a corner and stone ever so often nowadays. Sigh.

I am not sick i am not sick i am not sick i am not sick i am not sick i am not sick i am not sick. *inhales*

We shall not talk about O's. Sigh.

I resolve to not go to school early any longer, i shall go on the dot so that i wont have to be subjected to my friend's neverending questioning before papers.

As if i dont panic enough already. Sigh.

Screw the careless mistakes.

I really hope i didnt label the seq for ss wrongly.

Argh~~~!! >.<

Blew 23.70 buying the first 3 volumes of chrno crusades yesterday. Would have bought all 5 avaliable if not coz i wanted to keep a lil' extra cash. But guess no hope now. Popping back to pick up the other 2. Hehehehehe.

wings

Did this some days before prelims started.

Pardon the lousy english.

Boo.


Oh and dont steal ! Rawr. Inform me if you want it.

humanes

Went to Yvette's place to study today along with KangLi and Karen.

I brought my humanes stuff - ss textbookS and history textbookS.

Reaching, we took out our stuff and started our various cramming methods. In less than half and hour's time, the jejune ss textbook soon put me off as i proceeded to flip through the history textbook - Not that it was any better.

KangLi realises that i've yet to start on bio and urges me to "better start fast".

Forced myself to study, read, do notes, whatever for ss and history.

Took KangLi's bio notes and read on the microorganism chapter. Dont remember anything much though. Sigh.

Ran through the merger stuff with kangli coz she didnt understand the chap.

Did more ss notes (actually my notes're just a list of factors with regards to the chap written on a piece of post it paper and stuck on the cover of that subject's textbook =/).

Productive ? Not very. But it's better than being at home though. >.<

sliding pass

Was blog-hopping when i came across ZuoHan's blog. This entry of his struck a chord within me.


Drifting apart with a friend you hold dear. Sigh. Heartfelt.

O level blues

KaiLin finished her preparation for O's already ! ( Except for Geography. But not the main thing can ? )

*gasp*

How did she do it ?

Diligence.

Oh well.

ACJC.

Lol. Where's the bear ? =P


Shuyun, must buck up nah.

Weeee~ Outing with my sweet sista on 4th December~